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one last time

There have been times in my life where I have felt the dark night envelop me. I’ve loved till there was no love to keep for myself up.

Over the years I have learnt that you can’t love someone with your whole heart because inevitably that relationship will end, and if there is no love left, then there is nothing to keep you afloat.

There is nothing wrong with loving yourself, the great noel gallagher once said ” you have to love yourself, cos if you don’t no one else will” well I say you have to love yourself and let your love be your armour.

There may come a time when there is no one to love you, and even though someone I don’t know called Sally sends me emails on a daily basis trying to get my attention, trying to make me think that she will always be there for me, I know she is nothing to me.

Excuse me for being cautious with who I trust but I’m not about to let the world into the window of my life. If people can’t be honest, if people can’t tell you what they really think of you, for what ever reason they decide to keep it private. Then why bother telling them what’s going on. I hate fake people. If you want to be my friend stand up and join the gang, if not, I don’t give flying fuck why you think it’s important to pretend…so don’t pretend, be a man and drop the pretense, you are not impressing anyone let alone convincing anyone.

I’m not losing sleep over friends, I’m losing sleep over the choices I have to make, the life I have to live. And I have managed to get over worse things than working with someone who doesn’t like me. I don’t care if someone doesn’t like me, if you don’t like me, chances are you are a dick and you are not worth knowing in the first place.

Take your big bunch of “i’m so great, everyone loves me, I’m always right and your thoughts are not worth anything” and stick it up your arse, you arogant fuck !

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