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Drinking with friends and one friend states that it is harder to get out of a mortgage than a marriage. I retorted with the fact that I would never enter into the state of marriage unless I was certain it would last for some time, long enough for his net worth to increase so when the time comes to divorce him I get a good deal. I’m joking of course. What would it take for me to enter in to a mortgage I wonder?

It’s got me thinking though about how people end up in the marriages they are in, some do it to make the buying of a house more straight forward, some do it because they are scared of being alone and some do it because there is no more crazy fun to be had and it’s time to settle down and get serious. I got married because my mum needed an excuse to wear a hat, I love the man I’m spending the rest of my natural days with and everyone likes to get drunk and eat cake.

Side story on the hat, since I was about 16 my mum has been going on about wearing a hat at my wedding, for a time my Dad said he wouldn’t turn up if I got married in a church (is it any wonder that I’m as messed up as I am). My mum got cancer and lost all her hair (radiation is a bugger) it was hard for my mum as her hair had been her crowning glory all her life, we were thrilled when it started to grow back, for her sake.  With the news of a wedding on the cards my mum finally had a reason to wear a hat. The purchasing of the hat was tough. At first my Dad made a huge fuss because mum was taking too long to pick a hat (the wig was making it difficult) , thankfully mum went back with someone who cared and found a hat that went well. This hat got stopped at immigration at the airport of the way out to NZ, it got left behind at the suitcase collection point at Auckland airport, it got left behind at the hotel on their way back. My mum looked great in that hat.

So getting a mortgage…well it’s not a line that would get me into bed, for some reason I do like the idea of owning a huge chunk of concrete/wood/brick on a sizeable chunk of land with a few fruit trees, but I think the big sizeable chunk of debt scares the bejesus out of us as a couple and it’s not actually financially sensible at the moment so we’ll keep paying rent for the moment.

And what of those men and women who are married and mortgaged up to the eyeballs and still fuck the naive receptionist/admin lad…hard to get out of a marriage, hard to get out of a mortgage….very easy to bend the young filly over a desk before you go home for your egg/steak/fish and chips…it happens and who knows why.

I’m not so sure that either a mortgage or a marriage is secure, your house can burn down and so too can a marriage. Elvis said that fools rush in and Diana Ross said you can’t hurry love. I can’t say tat I have the perfect marriage but I am in love with my husband, if anything we have a good laugh at each other, with each other; at best I look at his face and my heart skips a beat, he turns me on still and I (even after having a baby) make him weak at the knees.  Sometimes it is all “who’s taking out the rubbish, who’s soothing the baby, who’s left the mess in the living room?” but there is also a fair smattering of slapping my arse, grabbing his cheeks and …I’ve said too much :)

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